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My fantasy is different from the ones I have read so far. I really get turned on by it, but I wonder sometimes why I have it. I described it to a friend, which was a mistake. She suggested that something like this must have really happened, but I am certain I have no memory of it. You need to know a lot of my history:
My mothers parents died in a car crash when I was only 2, so I only remember my other grandparents, who lived only a mile away. They always made me feel so very loved. My parents were too busy fighting with each other and then got divorced when I was about 8. But through it all, both my grandparents were just great. They cheered my efforts and were so pleased with my successes. They never condoned misbehaving, but I knew it was what I had done which displeased them, never me- because I knew that all I had to do was stop misbehaving and all would be OK. They always gave me the feeling that there was noplace in the world they would rather be than with me, listening to me, talking to me, loving me. And I truly loved both of them. It was just so great and the way I imagined my life would be, but that hasn’t happened.
I guess I have been looking for that feeling ever since they died, my grandmother when I was 15 and my grandfather only a few months later. I like to believe that their spirits still watch over me, encouraging me, and loving me, and preventing me from doing anything they would not approve of.
My fantasy is long and I actually spend a lot more time on the details than I will write: In my fantasy, my mother has divorced my father and I am living with her although I am 18 years old and could move out and get an apartment.
She has a “boyfriend” (Eddie is not a boy, he’s an old man) who arrives to take her to a fancy play, but she claims she is too ill to go anyplace. She decides that I should go with him, because the tickets to this play were very expensive and they shouldn’t go to waste. I was excited about the prospect of seeing it, and her boyfriend Eddie is really nice to me. Eddie is a lot older than my mom and had lots of money. He dresses very well and drives a Mercedes. It does not occur to me at the time that she is doing this to keep him from taking someone else to the play! And it does not occur to me that he would not want to take me to the play, but he doesn’t. He sits and fumes as I try to get dressed in a hurry.
I wear my moms dressiest black dress and my mom let me wear her pearls too. I had my hair up off my neck- it looks really nice, or at I think it does. I love the feeling of nylons on my legs, I rarely wear them. When I come down the stairs in high heels (mom’s shoes, I didn’t own any (even though I AM EIGHTEEN 18 ), I am holding onto the railing and wobbling a little, but I am gratified to see the smile on Eddies face, he obviously is impressed. The evening is a dream. We go to dinner and he helps me order and it is really great. And the dessert is even better, we split it and he gives me the “big half”. He listens to me and comment and admires, just the way my grandfather did. The play is fantastic. I laughed and cried and laughed again. I found myself constantly leaning against Eddie and he did not seem to mind. I would grab his arm and once I just reached over for his arm without looking, and my hand fell into his lap, without any special intent. Even though I removed it immediately, what I had felt there really got my attention. I had learned about Ankara escort sex, but it never occurred to me that Eddie is a male, and although I had seen my fathers penis when I was younger, what I felt seemed a LOT bigger. I found myself wanting to feel it again, but I knew that would not be “right”.
When the play is over, Eddie suggests we get split another dessert. Everything is just so perfect: the weather, my appearance, the way he listens to me and talks to me, the way he looks at me as if I were the most beautiful girl in the world. And the most interesting. I want him to hug me the way my grandfather did. I want him to know how happy he makes me feel. I want him to love me. We get in his car and he drives me home, but I don’t want to go home. My mom will talk about how miserable my dad is, and how great Eddie is. I would rather just stay with Eddie and find out for myself. I tell Eddie I want to see what the park is like this time of night since I never get out after dark. He doesn’t argue, but turns off to the park about 4 blocks from our house, and parks there. One other car is there, and we park far away from it. I note a couple in the car and I ask Eddie in a playful voice, “What are they doing here this time of night?”
He does not answer immediately and I realize he is struggling to think of an answer. Before he answers, I slide over next to him and put my arms around him and hug him really hard, and say, “You are SO great. I have never had so much fun. Really! Everything was just perfect!”
He still seems at a loss for words, and I let my head move against his chest. It is so comforting to be close to him and I feel so loved and appreciated, even though I assume he is only being polite to please my mother. With my face against his shirt and silk tie, I notice how wonderful and sexy he smells. I can’t get enough of it. He places his hands on my shoulders and I worry that he is going to push me away, but instead he says, “You are really a most beautiful young lady. He says, “It really was a very perfect night, I had forgotten what it was like to date someone who did not complain about anything.”
His hands are now caressing my arms and my back, and I fell so good all over and wish he could caress every inch of my body. That thought makes me warm in my private place and it is a wonderful feeling. I wonder if he would caress me THERE. That thought makes those feelings increase dramatically, and I squeeze my legs together to make it even better.
I just let my head slide down into his lap, and was surprised to find that my ear is right against the bulge in his pants, and the bulge is very solid and pulsating against my ear. I wonder if I am hurting him but I decide he can move me if I am. I find myself wishing I could just stay here in the car with him close to me. He shifts somewhat and I shift my head a little, which results in it being almost lifted by the pulsation of what I realize must be his penis. I wonder if this is normal, so I ask, “Is this what you do with my mom?”
He laughs a wonderful laugh and squeezes me against him, saying, “Sort of…but not exactly”.
“What can I do so you know that I love you every bit as much as my mom does. You make me feel so good, do I make you feel good too?”
“Yes, you make me feel very good. I have had a wonderful and memorable night.”
“My mom and dad used to touch each other under their clothing, do you do that with Ankara escort bayan my mom?”
“I love to have you touch me, would you touch me the way you do my mom?”
“I don’t think I should.”
“Please, I really like to have you hold me.”
He doesn’t take any more convincing than that, and his hands slide under my clothing, along my nylon covered legs and unzips the back of my dress so his hands can caress my skin. I undo my bra clip so it doesn’t interfere. His hands are magic on my back and legs, and he slides up across my lower abdomen. I know I want him to touch me the way I touch myself sometimes. I know it is “wrong”, but I know it will feel so good, and I want it so much. Why does he avoid doing that, I wonder. Maybe my mom won’t let him? I will. Maybe he wants me to ask him to do that? I can tell my panties are very wet and I wonder if that will upset him if he does touch there, so I say nothing, but tighten my thighs to push my excitement even higher. I know I am breathing hard, and when his hand brushes against my bare nipples, which are already as stiff as they can get, it is like electricity all up and down my body. I want him to do that again, but his hands move on. When they start up my thighs again, I reach down and push his hand into the wetness. He does not seem to resist this, or mind at all, and suddenly he slips under the elastic and is pressing against my swollen wetness. My back arches, my legs stiffen and I get that fantastic feeling which I can do myself, but this is ever so much better because I know how much he must love me.
His fingers have moved away, but as I come down from the incredible release, they return to gently probe and stroke me in ways which are better than I had discovered myself. And it happens again, making me tighten almost like a seizure and then totally release. He stops again, and I wonder if he will touch me again. I pray for him to touch me again, and I hear myself whispering, “again!”… And he does, and it works again.
I collapse, my breathing still almost gasping. He has released me and I slump on the passenger side of the beautiful leather seats. I notice him pushing at the bulge in his pants, and realize that he seems nervous. “That was amazing. I wish I could do that all day long! Do you think that would hurt me to do that all day long?”
That makes him laugh, and he does not seem so nervous.
“I guess I don’t know.”
Everything was just so great, but when he pushed again at his bulge, I asked “it ‘it’ OK? Am I supposed to do something to make you feel good too?”
“I feel very good, you are a lovely young lady. I am very happy you feel good and are having a good time.”
“WOW. Good time doesn’t begin to tell the story. Maybe you should show me what to do to let you know how much I love how you make me feel? What does my mom do when she wants you to feel loved and appreciated?”
He pauses, obviously thinking.. and conflicted. I find myself realizing that he knows it is “wrong” to touch me, and “wrong” for me to touch him. But I know how good I felt, how loved I feel, and how much I want him to feel the same way.
“You don’t need to do anything, I know you enjoyed the play.”
“The play was good, but everything was great, and the best part was having you touch me. Can I touch you? Would that feel as good to you as your touch did to me, or don’t you want me to?”
He laughs Escort Ankara again, and says, “OF COURSE I WANT YOU TO”. But don’t do anything you don’t want to do. He unzips his pants, and adjusts something, and his penis springs out.
It is as big as a banana, I realize. I though a penis was like a thumb! The tip is all pink and it has a sort of “head” with an edge. I slide over so I can hold it. My hand does not even cover half of it, so I squeeze first near his body, then move my hand and squeeze the end. I ask, “Is this right? Am I supposed to squeeze it?”
His voice seems shaky as he says “that feels just fine… just keep squeezing the end gently like that… “
I have only squeezed it about 10 times when he stiffens and suddenly it starts spraying all over. I let go and think maybe he has lost control of his bladder, but then I realize this must be sperm that I learned about in health class. He quickly has his handkerchief over it, but not before some hit the windshield and dashboard. I realize he is gasping and moaning, and he continues rubbing his penis for a few moments. I realize I should not have let go but continued when that happened. Then he tucks himself in, wipes the windshield and dashboard a little and starts the car.
“Thank you, that was really fantastic!”
“Well, you saw the results… I’m glad I didn’t get any on you! I don’t think your mom would approve, do you?”
I don’t answer. I don’t care about that. We are close to home, and when we park in the driveway, I expect my mom to be waiting, but she isn’t. I have pulled my skirt down, but I am still thinking about how good Eddie had made me feel, and I don’t want to go inside. I know what I want, but I am ashamed to tell Eddie. I don’t want him to say no. So I just tell him how really happy I am that he took me to that play. And then I just say,
“I really want you to make me feel good like that again, is that ok?”
Eddie laughs and says, “anything you want is going to be OK…you are a doll”
His comment makes me feel happy, loved, and also seems to go straight to that place between my legs! I am emboldened and ask, “Will you touch me again?”
“I think I can do something even better, if you want me to, OK?”
Before I can answer, he has lifted my left leg up so my foot is on the seat, my skirt slides up my thigh, and he can see between my legs. He pulls me over to him, and upward. I am amazed at how easily he lifts me and realize how strong he is. I want to feel him touch me, and he lifts my pelvis up and up, my left leg going behind his head and he pulls my panty crotch aside, and presses my private place against his lips. I feel his tongue moving across me, finding the most sensitive places, building the pressure, more and more, and …. the earth shakes and the world explodes and I seem to disappear into pure pleasure.
… that is pretty much the fantasy… by this time I have had each of the orgasms I have in the fantasy, the one imagining his tongue is often the best… and I am pretty much exhausted. I worry that this fantasy will stop working some day, but it has been pretty reliable for the past 4 years. Maybe I will meet a well dressed, loving older man and want to try it out with him. That would be fantastic. I realize it is just because I really want to feel loved and appreciated, but the orgasms are great too.
Maybe if I met an older man and he smelled good and treated me nice, I would want him touch me and lick me. Actually, I would want him to marry me too! And love me completely and forever, just the way my grandfather did my grandmother.
Anyway, that is my fantasy.
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