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Do Not Pass Go Ch. 03

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Life always balances accounts. Okay, so I hadn’t had sex in the last 11 months; to make up for it life had been fucking me over hard. Yes, I’m whining, but it wasn’t JUST the lack of sex that made me mad. I went to Catholic boys schools up until I went to college so even as a kid I knew about coerced celibacy. But then there’s a difference between celibacy when you’re a terminally virginal fifteen-year-old and celibacy as a divorced forty-year-old man, the difference is the same as dreaming of climbing Mt. Everest when you’re in a sinkhole in Kansas and when you’re sitting in a base camp in the Himalayas surrounded by Sherpas who are just never in the mood. Actually that last part is a good description of the last couple years of my marriage as well.

Now on top of everything else there’s breaking my hand. Well, spraining my wrist actually and having that done by my coworker, Maggie, slamming her trunk shut before I got my hand clear. It just proves you should never get greedy. Even in perfect condition I had worries about my upcoming date with Theresa. Pulling off some virtuoso fingering was going to be difficult with one gimpy paw. Maybe more importantly — being that I was a righty — it pretty much killed my backup plan.

It looked like there wouldn’t be anything to distract me from pre-date jitters. The business/first class section of the plane was practically empty and the three men and two women that were there with me had their heads buried in laptops or their eyes closed as they listened to headphones. Not being in the mood to read any of the magazines instead I spent the time studying the flight attendants. The only one interesting to me had a name tag that read Lily. Initially I’d guess her to be about thirty, but closer up, there were enough laugh lines to make me think her older. Stunning in an LA kind of way but without all of the plastic, she had short, ash blonde hair, blue eyes, and her body was trim and had good muscle tone. Tall at about 5’9″ she looked like a ballerina with maybe an extra fifteen pounds to keep her from starvation. Even pushing the drink cart down the aisle, she seemed to move on point.

The closest I had ever come to the mile high club was probably as a teenager staring at the cover of a fantasy novel while in a bumpy prop plane over Kansas. On the other hand for a long time I thought of myself as a mile-higher using as justification the fact that my ex-wife and I had sex in Denver during a mini-vacation just after our oldest daughter had been born. Having sex a mile up always seemed a silly distinction, up until I saw Lily.

There was something about her hands: short nails, smooth skin that was scented lightly with lotion. We touched when she handed me a soda and again when she clutched my wrist to make sure I didn’t drop it. The touch lingered and her eyes held mine.

Why was I thinking about Lily? Flying a thousand miles just for a date and I get distracted when I touch some woman’s hands. Lily was beautiful, but this just had to be nerves. How serious was the thing with Theresa and me? Maybe this wasn’t a date at all, but really a thousand-mile booty call.

Lily walked up from behind me stopping beside my aisle seat. Her blue eyes caught mine. “Broke it riding a Brahma bull, I suppose?”


“Your hand.”

“Oh. No, it’s sprained actually. I got it slammed in a car trunk. Not very glamorous…” Shit, this was flirting. I knew how to flirt didn’t I? “Not too big a deal except the car was on fire and I had to pull a baby to safety.”

Lily smiled mischievously. “Interesting parenting skills there.” I must have looked baffled. “The mother kept her baby in the trunk?”

“Well, you didn’t see how small this car was…” I shrugged. “Maybe it was a stack of printouts and the car might not have exactly been on fire. But it was warm in the parking garage.” I smiled and she just stared at me in that way beautiful women do that let you sit there feeling how stupid you are. Except she smirked a little bit after a second.

“I saw you in the airport two weeks ago when you were barking into your phone. Put that together with no ring on your finger and your nervousness and I’d say you’ve just gotten divorced.”

I started to nod and then stopped. “The only reason a man without a ring would yell into their phone is because of an ex-wife? I’m not saying you’re wrong, but…”

“You fit a type.” Her hand caressed my arm and she glanced quickly up and down the aisle. “A handsome, intelligent, charming man my age that isn’t trying to jump in my pants. Of course I could be wrong. You could be separated or gay …?”

“No, definitely not gay. Especially right now.” I stared at her and my eyes drifted down her body hesitating at her waist and especially her long legs.

She laughed. “I said you were the type that WASN’T trying to jump into my pants.”

God did this woman have beautiful blue eyes. “No, jumping would be wrong…”

“You prefer a slower approach?” Her sultry look was spoiled Escort bayan as she glanced up and caught the eye of a male flight attendant who mouthed some words at her. She looked back at me. “So you never told me, are you separated or divorced?”

“Divorced going on about half a year. And by the way, I’m Peter Wilkes.”

“Lily Neff…” She patted my hand again. “I’m not usually this forward. You do like me being forward, don’t you? No don’t answer that.” She glanced down the aisle and then leaned in toward me. Taking a drink coaster from her pocket she produced a pen and quickly scribbled her name down. “This is my number. Nothing else. If you call, you’re going to have to spend at least half an hour flirting with me until I give you a chance at a date. You dance, don’t you? I mean you know how to dance. No phobias about twirling a woman around the room.”

“It’s been a little while, but with thinking about you as an incentive it strikes me I could manage it. Just in case, first thing when I get home I’ll sign up for lessons.” Lily’s eyes flitted through a range of emotions and at the end she ended up kind of staring through me.

“So…” I said.

Lily’s eyes refocused, but still her expression seemed a little distant.

“So do I pass the test?”

God, it was like I was highschool again. In the second she hesitated, a dozen different memories of rejection came back.

“The test isn’t over yet. You’re doing good so far. But…” She stared at me a second, considering my face. “You’re not really planning on taking dance lessons, are you? Never mind. You live in Minneapolis right?”

“No. St. Paul.”

“Close enough.” She smiled and straightened up. Only when she let go of my arm, did I notice I had developed a hell of an erection. “You realize how easy I’m making this on you? The only reason I’m giving you my number is because you seem too easy going to ask yourself. You weren’t, were you? No, don’t…”

“It had nothing to do with not wanting to. Mostly it’s lack of practice. And it isn’t easy to ask out such a beautiful woman.”

She caught the movement of me shifting in my seat to ease the pressure in my pants. God, what was I fifteen? Thankfully she didn’t laugh. In fact she glanced at my crotch and smiled.

My wrist throbbed, ruining the moment. “I hate to change the subject, but you wouldn’t happen to have a cold pack I could use? I’m supposed to ice my wrist down every three or four hours.”

“The chemical packs are for emergency use, but could you make do with a plastic bag filled with ice cubes?”

I nodded and then cursed my wrist again for blowing it for the rest of my body. “That would be great.”

She touched my shoulder. “Anyway I should be getting back to work.”

Seeing Lily at a distance as she glanced up every now and again to look at me, kept me very erect and off balance for the rest of the flight. Just watching her walk was a treat, beautiful eyes, lithe body and those long legs. Imagining those legs twisting around my back holding me inside her made me light headed. As the plane landed, she stood by the exit smiling and saying goodbye to everyone. Passing by, I smiled at her.

“Thank you for flying with us,” she said. “And don’t forget.”

Waiting for the shuttle to take us to the main terminal served as decompression. Maybe it was just shock. A beautiful flight attendant tried to pick me up the same day that I had a date with Theresa. Sprained wrist or not, I might make a dent in the twelve pack of condoms and the six little blue pills I had borrowed from a friend of mine.

The problem was there was this stupid part of me that felt like this was committing adultery. It’s not that my ex-wife — even when she wasn’t an ex-wife — deserved loyalty; even though I didn’t want to ever be with Jessie again, it was hard to think about being with someone else. Shit, every movie I saw where a forty-year-old man went on a date always seemed to end in disaster.

It took forever to get out of the airport and my optimistic guess of being able to pick up Theresa by 7:30 proved amazingly wrong. Despite the nerves and guilt that I had been battling, by the time Theresa buzzed me in, I was calm.

Theresa was so good looking it was painful. Not as sleek and sculpted as Lily was but fresh and young, Theresa was a woman I could imagine sitting at a table in a college bar with four equally pretty friends or a damp-shirted beauty at a sorority car wash. Most exciting to me was her long blonde hair that I could spend hours running my hands through.

Theresa flushed and ran her hands around the edges of the little black dress she wore. “Stop staring at me. You’re making me nervous.”

“Sorry. It’s… you look better than anything I could have dreamed up.”

Her normally pale face was flushed and even her delicate little ears had pinked up. The little black dress was a sexy number, one that she obviously wore braless, because as I focused I saw the slight bulge of her Bayan escort nipples. Seeing the direction of my gaze and looking down made her flush redder.

I smiled. “Obviously, it’s a little cold in the room.” I put my suitcase down just to the edge of the door. “Time was short, so I had to come straight from the airport. And because I screwed-up my hand, we’re going to have to go by taxi tonight.”

“Don’t worry about that.” She looked me over. “You look very handsome. Oh, come on, the longer we sit around here the more nervous I’m getting. Let’s get to the restaurant before I chicken out.”

In the taxi I couldn’t help but check her out from time to time. In her own way Theresa was doing the same to me.

She settled her hand against my chest and slowly rubbed. She whispered into my ear, talking low to keep our conversation from the taxi driver. “It’s strange, isn’t it?”

Silly remarks jumped into my head, but I didn’t want to ruin the moment. “Strange?”

“A year ago I was trying to jump your bones in a bar and one year later…”

“You’re going to wait until after dinner?”

Her hand tensed and then she laughed and quickly stifled it as the cab driver looked back at us. She leaned very close pressing her hard nipples into my arm. “Peter, are you trying to get me not to have sex with you?”

“Um, no please.”

She started to laugh again, but stopped herself after glancing in the direction of the cabdriver. “Well, at least you’re polite.”

“Absolutely, after I’m done eating you out until you start screaming and fucking you within an inch of your life, I’m going to Hoover your crotch and bat my pathetic eyes and ask ‘More please?'”

“More please?”

I clutched her thigh. “Okay, how about, ‘Much more please?'”

Luckily the dinner reservation was for 9:00, but as it turned out we were there only in the nick of time, especially having to stop off at a pharmacy to pick up some cold packs for my wrist — Theresa insisted. Reservation or not, we waited fifteen minutes at the bar. While Theresa nursed her martini, I iced down my wrist.

We talked and ate awkwardly, both of us, I think, looking forward to when we were going to get home. Somehow we talked about the fact that I wouldn’t be getting a hotel room tonight without really talking about it. The mood was so strong, I didn’t even think of trying to be coy at the end of the meal when I fished out my Viagra pill and swallowed it down.

“Never had problems before, but I wanted to make sure for tonight,” I said.

Everything was about getting back to her apartment and getting to the night of sex that was almost a year overdo. We kissed in the cab, we were feeling each other casually our mild kissing camouflage for the exploring our hands were doing. I stopped her from going into my pants because with her dress there was no subtle way I could reciprocate. Actually, the kissing and petting only lasted for half of the ride because at some point we looked up and caught the driver leering at us through the rear view mirror.

Once back in her apartment, Theresa was all over me. God did I hate having to deal with my bad wrist. As it was, she was all over me. It overwhelmed me. Even as our lips touched and we opened our mouths, her hands had opened my pants and dove for my cock. With my left hand I was just holding on, leaning into the kiss, and playing with her tongue.

She pushed me down on the sofa as she leaned over to pull me out of my pants. “Just accept it. I’m in the driver’s seat tonight.” She kissed my mouth and my earlobe as she pulled me out of my shirt. When she dove on a nipple, I really thought I would be freaked out, but she wasn’t sucking me, she was playing with it, licking the sides and slurping her tongue, with each nipple giving me a prelude for the blowjob she was going to give me. She pulled down my black boxers to just above the knees.

“How do you want it, hard and fast, or slow and sensual?”

“I don’t care. Theresa please?”

She leaned down and licked the corona tonguing away a trickle of precum. “You taste good, Peter, but I really want an answer.”

“Hard and fast…”

She licked down one side of my cock and then up the other her fingertips tickling along my balls. When she got to the top, she swallowed me in and it was like remembering paradise. God, why had it been so long. Her lips drew tight about three inches down and she slowly pulled back up, humming as she did. As wonderful as her mouth felt, it was only half of my pleasure the rest was my hands gliding through her soft blonde hair holding it out of and seeing her beautiful face connected to me.

Theresa lingered at the crown, her lips pulling back and forth just on that inch as her tongue played over the top. Then she pulled back and blew a thin jet of cool air over the top.

“God, I love flutists.”

She giggled and grabbed my balls. “No jokes. I’m trying to drive you crazy.”

“Okay no jokes, but please keep doing Escort what you’re doing. I promise to return the favor, two for one.”

Her hands stroked me as she playfully licked at my balls. “What does that mean? You’re going to suck two guys…”

Despite the Viagra and her active fingers and tongue my cock started to go soft. “Orgasms. I’m going to tongue your lovely little pussy until you cum at least two times. Then I’m going to put your legs over my shoulders and wheelbarrow you until neither of us can move.”

Midway through my little speech she took my cock back into her mouth, so I’m not sure if she got everything I said. At that point I didn’t care. My cock fought to stay in her mouth, as I thrust my hips forward whenever she pulled back. I was getting close and my cock bobbed around in her mouth, twitching little shudders making my cock twitch side to side. She sucked harder.

“I’m getting really close…”

Theresa grunted and her head rocked forward and back faster. My left hand was on her shoulder, not guiding her movements, but feeling them becoming part of the piston that was ramming her mouth onto me.

“Please. Oh. Really close.” And that was it. My cock blasted off in her mouth and her mouth froze just over the head. I spurted and she sucked and it was the most unbelievable joy in the world. My body shook and she was drawing every bit of me in, grabbing on my ass and holding me firm. Her tongue laved the sensitive underside of my cock making each spurt stronger. And she took it all in, sucking in all of my cum until I sagged deep into the couch cushions. Still she stayed connected to me, her mouth leeched around my cock, just holding it softly inside her mouth, somehow avoiding the sensitive cockhead, but keeping me inside her mouth a couple seconds before pulling off. She kissed my cockhead a second.

“I’ll be right back,” she said as she got up. I just lay there while she was gone. God, this wasn’t new, but somehow it was as if in the last 11 months I had regained my virginity and now lost it again. And unlike the first time it had lasted more than twenty seconds. It was so good it was unreal. Maybe Theresa hadn’t played all sorts of elaborate games with my cum like the women in porn did, but she had swallowed me. Had done it and seemed to enjoy it and that just blew me away.

When she got back, she moved my still firm cock between my legs and sat down on my lap. She kissed me on the lips and I tasted mint.

I just stared at her for a second. “That wasn’t a hard and fast blowjob.”

“Never said that it would be. I just asked you to see how turned on you were.” She cupped my face and we shared a long passionate kiss. “Now how about those two orgasms you promised me?” She smiled and gave me a quick kiss. “Seriously, just try to get me to climax once and then we’ll take a breather before we try out you and your wheelbarrow.”

“Why just one?”

She laid her head against my shoulder and pulled my left arm around her. “My clit gets really sensitive after I cum, so it’s just the one orgasm for me.”

My left hand brushed the underside of one of her breasts as I leaned down and kissed the top of her shoulder. As I began nibbling on her earlobe, she yawned.

“Sorry, it’s not you. I’m just really behind in my sleep. Keep doing what you’re doing.”

As I tried to shift her off my lap, she wrapped her arm around me. “No, I want to stay just like this.”

It was a little frustrating at first with only one hand to work with and the only thing that my tongue could get to was her ears and neck. But Theresa was so excited, she was doing the work for me. I licked my finger before beginning to play with her pussy, but there was no need, she was overflowing. And soon as my finger got there, she reached her hand down and began moving them for me, slowing my movements to a gentle in and out rhythm. When I started to reach up for her clit, she pulled my fingers back, bringing me back to a slow finger fucking, plunging one of her fingers alongside of my own. After several minutes of this, she pulled back and I continue with two fingers as she slowly rubbed at her clit. Her breathing got faster and I felt her body tense. And right at that moment I reached in and started feeling for her g-spot. She became stiff as a board, gulped some air in, and then shook through a long orgasm. Just as I had when her orgasm finished she nestled back against me. Pinned between her and the sofa, I still felt proud of bringing her to orgasm, although I really had wanted to eat her out to a couple of orgasms. After maybe a minute of this quiet satisfaction, Theresa’s soft regular breathing was interrupted by a mild snore. I wondered if this ever happened to Don Juan.

It turned out getting out from under Theresa without waking her was simple. Well she did wake-up a little but just kind of fluttered her eyes and patted my arm before getting back to sleep. It would have been nice to carry her to her bedroom, but with one working arm that wasn’t going to happen.

It didn’t feel right sleeping in her bed when she was on the sofa, but more than that things didn’t feel right somehow. I tried to figure out what felt wrong. And that was the thing. Nothing felt wrong.

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